When Mom and Dad Both Have Dementia
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Q. My mother, Mary, is in a world of her own. I call it “Mary-land.” She often walks around in circles fussing about the “people who are breaking into the house." We live in a quiet safe neighborhood, which hasn’t had a break-in in at least fifty years! She’s exhausted, disheveled, and constantly afraid. She is in no way the strong, vibrant person I remember my mother to
be.
Things would have been a tad bit better if dad was available to help. My father, Peter, is delusional, agitated, and abusive at times, like a bad drunk, but without the alcohol. He too was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, a year after she was. So, here I am with two parents, both of whom barely resemble the parents I grew up with.
As you can imagine, watching both your parents lose mental competency is a heart-wrenching journey. I feel like I’m going through an extended grieving process with no closure in sight. My patience is certainly being tested every day, but I try to keep my chin up as best as I can. There are few positive moments here and there, when I bring my children over to see them and when mom tells me on
occasion that she loves me. What advice would you give someone in my situation as far as dealing with this scenario and planning for the future? Also, am I more likely to get Alzheimer’s if both my parents have it? Thanks for your help!
Critter Corner: Can an Eye Exam Predict Alzheimer’s?
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I read somewhere that a simple eye exam can predict whether or not someone will get Alzheimer’s. Is this true?
Order Books by Evan Farr, 4-Time Best-Selling Author
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Certified Elder Law Attorney and Medicaid Asset Protection Expert, Evan H. Farr, CELA, has written four best-selling books in the field of elder law. For more information and to order, click here.
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